Monthly Archives: February 2011

Something About Us

Vern's obituary

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VernPam’s family have posted an obituary online, via the Calgary Sun.

Here is a link to the online version.

I’m going to put in the text here, because I know the online version will someday be unavailable, and I think it needs to be preserved.

Vern AmeroAMERO, Vernon James – September 18, 1925 – February 22, 2011 It is with great sadness that the family of Vern announce his sudden passing. He is survived by his wife Barb of fifty-five years; daughters Pam (Maurice), Cathy (Roland) and son Peter.

He was predeceased by wonderful parents, Mary and Donald Amero of Digby County, Nova Scotia. He is also predeceased by cherished siblings, Lillie, Joseph (Bosie), Dorothy, Blanche, Lenis, Lloyd and Percy. Also left to mourn are his loving sister Emelie (Millie) of Digby, brother Donny and his wife of Wood’s Harbour, N.S., many nieces and nephews and other family who loved him.

A special recognition to the staff of Swiss Chalet and Calgary Co-op Westhills for jokes exchanged and your kindness to dad over the decades. You were so much more to him than a place to go.

Many thanks to Dr. Botha, Annie and staff as well as Rockyview General professionals who cared for him.

Dad was a career soldier having served in the Canadian army with immense pride from November 1943 to May 1947 and again from May of 1951 to March of 1979. He was awarded the Canadian Volunteer Service Medal, the War Medal 1939-45, the Canadian Force decoration and clasp, among others. He also served many years as a Commissionaire.

Dad enjoyed woodworking, making beautiful detailed doll houses complete with curtains he made himself. In later years, he loved to work on word find books, go out with family to eat and shop and never missed listening to a “Flames” game. Dad was quick to write a letter but had a funny quirk in that when he was convinced he was owed a letter he was more than willing to “wait ’em out”.

Dad had a real love for dogs. He had a great sense of humour even while he struggled with chronic health problems. He was a great dad to us and always had a smile. His favourite saying was: “Better than a kick with a frozen mukluk!”

A religious man in his heart, we wish him peace and offer our thanks to be a part of a beautiful life lived.

Simple cremation with no service by his request is imminent. Please honour him with a kind remembrance or a prayer and a cup of tea.

We love you Dad!

Something About Us

More about Vern

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Peter and VernHere is a picture of Vern and his son Peter. I’ve always liked this picture. It’s been on our fridge for I don’t know how long. I’m not even sure where it is taken. I think near Banff.

Vern AmeroPeter sent me this picture of Vern in an email last night. It was taken with a cell phone, at the Rockyview hospital, just an hour before he passed away. All the kids have asked me to post this, as this is how they want to remember him – smiling and happy.

Doe mentioned that she had lost her father at eight years old. It certainly does remind one just how lucky they can be to have their parents live to a ripe old age.

Health Issues, Something About Us

Pam's father, Vernon J. Amero

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Vern AmeroLast night we got a phone call just shortly after nine pm. It was from Pam’s brother. Their father had passed away just minutes earlier. He was 85 years old.

He had been having some health related issues recently, so it was not a total shock, but still unexpected at this time. He did not suffer, and the hospital stay was mercifully short.

Pam and her fatherVern was a great guy. Simple, loving and lovable. He took great pride in his children. He loved to send letters, and his letters were homey, interesting and sweet. He wasn’t afraid to express his emotions, and it was nice to know that he cared so much for the people around him. He spoke often of the love for his wife, for his son who provided so much comfort to him, and he was happy that his daughters had found love in their lives too.

Vern in uniformAs a young man Vern lied about his age so he could join the military. He served in the medical corp for much of his career, and retired to Calgary, where he lived quietly. He loved to make doll houses, complete with miniature furniture.

I remember when Pam and I first moved in together, before we were married, he was the first person who knocked on our door. He brought with him a stool he had made, (our first piece of furniture!) and then we sat around on the floor while he regaled us with jokes and card tricks. He had a wonderful sense of humor, and his ability to turn a card trick was amazing.

He had a long life, and was blessed with good health throughout much of it.  We will miss him very much.

Pam has flown home to be with her family at this difficult time.

Health Issues

Cancer Agency Visit Feb 16th 2011

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Today we met with my Oncologist Dr Oja. He was great. I really liked his manner, the tone he set, he took so much time with us, he answered a ton of questions, gave his opinion on issues and he was a wealth of knowledge. I was impressed.  I’m not easily impressed. He answered Maurice’s questions and included him in the visit. There was not one thing I could complain about.

So, to the nitty gritty…  he looked at the size of original tumor 1.1cm , grade of tumor (2) and my age and general health etc. He said they know % rates for  relapses,  risks of death…  with just doing nothing except the radiation which I will need to have for sure from 4-6 weeks of it. The % of risk of relapse if they add 5 yrs of hormone therapy (which for me was strongly recommended), and what the % risk of death is with hormone therapy….  then they added in what the risks would be with chemotherapy added for relapse and death. So I’ll just write it out as succinctly as I can (a chore for me as anyone who knows me knows..)

As things are, with doing nothing but Radiation = 25-35% of risk of relapse, 8-12 % risk of death from breast cancer.

Adding Hormone therapy (which was strongly recommended I do, and have done) = 5 yrs of Letrozole prevents a further 12-18% of relapses  (puts me about 13% chance or relapse) plus prevents  2-5 % risk of death from breast cancer  (puts me down to 6-7% chance death)

PLUS adding Chemotherapy = 6 treatments each 3 weeks apart (possible to do, but not strongly recommended) prevents extra 6 % of relapses  (would put me at 7%) plus prevents  2-4 % of deaths.   (would put me 4-6%)

The chemo is harsh on the body and there are potentially serious side effects/complications that didn’t seem worth the risk to do it considering that my cancer was caught so early and only one lymph node involved.  Dr Oja went over all of the risks and complications with us and did not strongly recommend I do chemo as well, but that choice is up to me. I have made the decision that I am not going to do the chemo.  I walked in there thinking I would throw everything I was offered at it, but after looking at the stats and the risks and the percentages, I feel like I’m making the right decision, and at the end of the day, that is what is important.. is that I’m comfortable with the decision that I have to live with. 🙂

I also asked about clinical trials that were going on, so we will see if I am to be a part of them, they have done some blood work today, and I also had a chest xray today, got my first 3 months of Letrozole  and met with the clinical trials nurse.

I’m still having some nerve pain from the surgery, and areas of numbness. I am meeting with my family Dr on Feb 22nd, and I’ll let her see the data and let her know what I’ve decided, and we will take a snapshot as to how I’m feeling and see if I feel ready to go back to work. Today I don’t, but the 22nd is 6 days away so I’m hoping that things will feel better by then! 🙂

I will post things as they happen 🙂 I’m grateful Maurice was with me.

…Pam…

Health Issues

Friends visit

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I had 2 of my co-workers, (but I will call them friends, for that is what they are)  visit today for a while. They spent some time with me sitting in the living room just gabbing about things going on, telling me stories and made me laugh. It was a nice visit, and they brought a big bristle board with stickies on it and notes from so many people at work wishing me a happy valentines and get well wishes, and they brought food as well, so Bonus!

Helen brought some home made red pepper/tomato soup and some buns, and Laila brought some Naan and some Chicken Methi and an eggplant dish. Maurice and I just enjoyed half of the soup, and will have the rest for tomorrow for lunch (thanks Helen!) and we will have the east Indian dishes tonight for dinner (thanks Laila!). The soup was really swell, and we wolfed it down. I know Laila is a great cook so I’m looking forward to having the dinner tonight to taste the flavours.

So far I’ve had visits from several friends at work including  Maggie, Gen, Jeanette, Sue, Gloria L, Donna S, Cheryl W, Deb C, Emely and Helen R and Laila. Plus I have had emails from so many people, it’s really swell to have such support around us. Thank you everyone who has come over, who has emailed, who has phoned, who chipped in for the gifts from both sites, and who has cooked for us. You all have been just awesome and I’m in awe of how great everyone has been. Like I say, I may have breast cancer, but I can’t help but think I’m a lucky woman. I’ve a man who loves me, a furbaby who loves me, family who love me, and great friends and co-workers, a job I love…  a home I love, .. life is good.

…Pam…

Health Issues

Cancer Clinic appointment

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I got a call from surgeon’s office today, and she had a date for the cancer clinic appointment. I am to go on Feb 16th @ 12:40. So now at least I have a date. Maurice is coming with me 🙂 Once we meet with the oncologist we should be able to find out when the radiation treatments will start, and discuss options as to hormonal and chemo options. Hopefully we’ll find out when that will start as well. I imagine I’ll have to have some baseline blood work for kidney and liver function done, but I’m not 1000% sure. 🙂

It is probably nuts to be excited to have a day for the cancer clinic, but I can’t help but feel optimistic that things are moving along at a good speed. At least things are happening. They might not be good things, but I feel like I’m wading through this process one heavy step at a time. Two surgeries done, now on to the cancer agency for the next hoop!

Today I am having a visit from a couple of co workers – Helen R and Laila  so that will be a swell visit. 🙂 It’s very cheering to me to have friends come by and I so appreciate all of the emails and calls etc. I’m looking forward to seeing them.

I continue to do the physio exercises but they are hard to do to get arm extensions done as it hurts ++ in axilla and at surgical site, but the surgeon assured me that I should push through it, that the surgical site is not going to pull apart, and to try to do them as best I can to keep myself limber and prevent getting a frozen shoulder.  The neck is still bothering me today, but I’m trying my level best to just keep it in good alignment and hope that it doesn’t flare further.

…Pam…

Health Issues

Surgeon's update

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We got good news at the surgeons. I have a copy of the pathology report from the remaining lymph nodes (she took out 6 more on Feb 1st). It shows there is no further cancer in remaining 6 nodes they took out. I told Dr Janzen  about the numbness and the nerve pain I was having. She said costal nerve was not cut so thinks it will improve when swelling healing happens.. says nerves get manipulated etc, so hopefully it will improve, it’s numb in parts and hypersensitive in others. She said she felt the incisions were healing well.

I saw family Dr today and I go back and see her again on 22nd, to see if I feel ok enough to go back to work. Told her right now I’m not, that nerve pain and extensive numbness etc was gross right now… plus my neck C6-7 pain has been exacerbated (not as severe as before, but it’s not right either, and is causing me some bother).  So I’ll hear from and see cancer clinic  hopefully in the next couple weeks.  I am feeling good that there was no remaining cancer, but still could be cells in breast along track where biopsy was… so hopefully the radiation will blast any remaining cells.

The worst part right now is this unrelenting pain and numbness that is there all the time. I wasn’t expecting any nerve pain. I had read that there might be numbness,  but this pain is weird. I want it to fade away with the swelling and I hope that it does.

So the short version is, I think I got good news today. I still have to see Cancer clinic and talk to them, and I know I will need 4-6 weeks of radiation, but what I don’t know, is if I will also need chemo along with the tamoxifin or other hormone receptive med I will be put on. Both of my drs told me they think I will also need to have chemo as the cancer spread to a lymph node…  but I will talk to the cancer clinic. This is their specialty and it’s a new road I’m on, so i’ll listen carefully to all options ahead.

I’m resting up for the next hoop to jump through to get me through this. I thank everyone who’s emailed me and or called/visited. It’s swell to have friends and feel supported.

…Pam…